Why is this so very hard for me?
I am referring to choosing/designing Eden's grave marker. Marcus and I have been very slow in getting this done because it has been so very difficult for the both of us. Every time we go in to "make decisions" we just become too emotional to do anything and end up leaving a mess. I think it's the finality of doing this that upsets me, knowing that this is the final step. On the flip side though, it makes me sad to think that no one knows who is laying under the flowers stabbed in the ground at her site. I hate that I have to do this, but it's a reality and she deserves a proper memorial.
We are very blessed to have Eden buried in a beautiful, private cemetery near a fountain in lovely surroundings. However, with this comes very stringent regulations as to what and how we can design her marker. I am more than happy to abide by the standards, but I want something fabulous for my princess. The first time we met with them I felt as if they were so scripted and not willing to think outside the box. That will not happen again! Yesterday we met with another company to get some fresh ideas and now I am ready to make a masterpiece. What do I want you ask? I want a vase of course so we can load it up with flowers of the season. I also want her picture lasered on the bronze along with a foot and hand print. I want her names, her dates and a short saying from Marcus and I. I look at it as a blank palate which we can make superb and that is what I intend to do. As visitors peruse the cemetery I want them to see Eden's maker and feel instantly her sweet spirit by seeing her photo. I feel like it's the least we can do for her. Now obviously we have a budget and although it's modest, I think I can be creative. I fought through so many issues regarding Eden and I can do it again to make it just right.
I love my Eden and I miss her badly lately. Maybe it's because her "angel day" is approaching and I remember so distinctly just how sick she was last year at this time. What a blessing she is to our family to know that she is our child FOREVER. I thank my Father in Heaven every day for that knowledge.
4 comments:
I know just how you feel. My baby is buried there too. It was incredably difficult for us to get what we wanted. We had no idea what we were doing(who does in those moments). We don't live there so we wanted to get it figured out while we were there. In the end it did turn out beautiful but you would think as for something they do on a regular basis and for something so pernament, they would be a bit more flexible and creative. I know that it will all work out perfectly for you in the end. Can't wait to see pictures. Your little angel has touch our lives in so many ways.
I know that no matter how simple or how complex it will be, Eden will love it. Because it is something made from love and she will appreciate the heart and soul that goes into it. We are excited to see the finished product!
I am sorry you have to go through this. I know whatever you choose will be wonderful, and I can't wait to see it. Let me know if I can help in any way. Love ya!
It's hard becuase you want it to be perfect, fit for a princess, and darling just like her. Not to mention it'll last forever and if you don't like then oh well. It's also another reminder as if there isn't enough anyways. I'm certainly no pro and I haven't done Jersey's yet but if you need opinions or help I'm always here. Sure love you!!
Post a Comment