Paper Doll

Here are the words to a favorite bedtime song in our house:

I'm gonna buy a paper doll that I can call my own,

one that other fellows can not steal,

and then those flirty, flirty guys

with their flirty, flirty eyes

 will have to flirt with dollies that are real,

when I get home at night there she'll be waiting

she'll be the sweetest doll in all the world,

I'm gonna buy a paper doll that I can call my own

instead of have a real, live girl.

As I was putting the girls to bed the other night they asked that I sing this song to them.  Ainsley likes the song, but Emerson absolutely LOVES it.  I find her rocking her dolls sometimes and singing it to them.  I struck me at that moment that the only reasons I sing this song to them is because my mom used to sing it to me every night when I was a child.  When I asked her where she had heard it she said, my mom sang it to me when I was a girl.  I have no idea where this song originated or how long the mommies in our family have been singing it to their daughters, but it brings back such great memories of my childhood.  I wonder if my girls will sing it to their daughters one day and keep the song alive?  It's little moments like this that make me so thankful to be a mother even though it can be so challenging.  I can honestly say it is the hardest thing I have ever done, but by far the most rewarding as well.  I attribute it all to my own mother for she was the very best mother and friend a girl could have.  I always knew my limits and what was expected of me, and those expectations were high, but I NEVER doubted that she loved me more than anything in this world.  Thanks mom, I love you and thanks for singing me "paper doll, it is still one of my preferred songs!"

The days come and the days go and despite our challenges we are blessed.  Ainsley asked to go visit Eden in the "tunnels" so we will be making a trip to the cemetery tomorrow  or Friday.Each of the girls picked out a small mylar balloon to stick in the ground at her grave that says "I Love You."  She forgot the word cemetery so she explained it as "you know, where she lives in the tunnels." It is also time for us to get working on her gravestone as it  really bothers Ainsley that no one knows she is there.  She told me the other day that she is afraid we won't be able to find her without it marked.  I assured her that although the grass is growing in on her  grave, we will always know where she is and we will have a marker soon.  It's just so hard deciding what it should say as we want it to be perfect to honor her.  We love  you Eden.